I am not an Object.

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING BLOG WILL BE A RANT OF RANTS, MEANING COHERENCY, ORDER AND CONCISENESS ARE NOT GUARANTEED.

What is the meaning of all these sex-related excerpts I have posted, you may be wondering. Well, let me tell you a couple of stories that get me really worked up.

Yesterday at work, I was coiling agendas, as is usual for me this summer. What is NOT usual, is that the back cover of an agenda for a large university in Canada was an advertisement for a night club. Okay, I understand that secular universities are known to have a lot of the type of people that like to go to night clubs. But this advertisement was a picture of a topless woman with her back to the camera. At first it just shocked me, because most of the agendas I've coiled are for elementary and junior high schools, with worms or apples or trees on the covers. After the initial surprise wore out, I just got really worked up. This was practically soft pornography on the back cover of an agenda that will be distributed to every student at this university. There is no way that this would fly at the U of M (at least I sure hope not). Me, and people like me, would complain, make a fuss, and fight for the value of women. It is degrading. Pictures like this reinforce the idea that a woman is a piece of meat. That the reason a woman is worth anything is not because she is human - capable of intelligent conversation and feelings, and full of worth - but because she can sexually arouse men.

The majority of boys at the factory yesterday seemed to think that the cover was great. It looked nice, and - though they didn't say these exact words - it was sexy. This bothered me a lot, though I can't say it really surprised me. These guys aren't surprised to see a picture like this. They see pictures like this (and worse) every day. This is normal in our culture. And they like it. They can get turned on at every turn. One guy at the factory, after we had argued for a while, finally said, "As a guy, I like the cover. As a person, I agree with you." As if those two things were different. It was as close as he came to saying that women should be valued, but men just don't.

A few girls at the factory seemed to think that the cover was fine. It looked nice, and hey, if that woman wanted to be photographed that way, why should we stop her? This made me sad, though it also didn't really surprise me. Women have been told so consistently by the media and the men in their lives that their value lies in their sexual attraction, that they start to believe that is really what they need to pursue. They have been told that if they give themselves away, they will be desired, and being wanted - even if it is in a perverted and objectified context - is better than not being wanted at all. Women have been told lies about who they are and what they should be, and many of them believe them.

A few months ago I was shopping in Toronto, and above the store American Apparel, there was a humongous picture of a topless woman wearing skin colored, skin-tight pants, with her back to the camera and leaning against a wall. It was pretty much disgusting, degrading, objectifying and enraging. I was really worked up, but I was by myself, so I just though about it for a while, and decided that I really didn't like the way that pictures like that are accepted in our culture, and how I never wanted to shop at that store and support a company that would promote themselves by using women as objects. Anyways, since then I have brought up that picture with a number of friends, since it sort of stuck with me. Not everyone thinks this is an issue. Not everyone thinks we should make a big deal about this. That makes me sad. I am not an object. I don't want to be whistled at and cat-called and given attention because I am a thing that some guy thinks he can use. I am precious. I know because God has told me I am. You are too. And as long as sexual images are accepted in culture, women will continue to be seen as objects.

This may not seem like the hugest deal ever in your own life (though I think that it is still a big problem for everyone in our culture) but the fact is that this type of mindset being so accepted encourages and continues to fuel prostitution and sex-trafficking. Women are being sold into a life of being used sexually by men and have no way to get out of it. Like that one quote from "Pornification Nation" (see last post), "If men stopped buying sex today, women wouldn't be trafficked tomorrow." The problem is bigger than just you and me. Something needs to change.

And so what? How can we ever change the face of our culture? Well, the only answer I can come up with is that my job is to do the small things that are in my reach that are consistent with my beliefs. This means that I am planning on talking to my boss about making a policy that they won't make agendas that have degrading pictures on them. It means that I try not to laugh at jokes that objectify women. It means that when I see a degrading photo being used to sell clothes, I boycott stores. You may think that these things won't do anything. Well, like everything in life, all I can do is what I can do. I have to believe that my little contribution does make a difference. I have to do my best to act in consistency with my beliefs. I'm not saying that this is the only issue out there. It is not. I'm not saying I've got it all together, and you should be doing some of these things and be more like me. I don't have it all together. I know that I am probably doing some things that are not consistent with my beliefs. Please point them out to me if you see them. I want my life to be a continual reshaping of who I am into someone a little more Christ-like. I have a long ways to go. The only way this happens is if we help each other, and when we are made aware of something, we show each other, so that we can push one another on to a higher standard. Let's keep pushing.

Okay, I could probably rant forever, so I'll just leave it at that.

"American culture presents women as sexually available anywhere, anytime. If you look at fashion, literature, advertising, and entertainment, you see what some experts call the 'pornification' of culture."

"[Sexually toxic material] is so mainstream now, most people think, Whatever. Once people start accepting sexual images in daily life, they're not as shocked to encounter more explicit images in hard-core porn."

"Pornography fuels prostitution - and prostitution fuels sex trafficking."

"Pornography creates an environment that objectifies women."

"The average age for male exposure to porn is 11... such material conditions young boys - and males of all ages - who view it to think that this is normal human sexuality, that women enjoy being degraded."

"If men stopped buying sex today, women wouldn't be trafficked tomorrow. The equation is simple."

"I'm not going to revolutionize the state of American grocery stores. I need thousands of women across the country going to their grocery stores and saying, 'I find these magazines disgusting. I feel violated at my own grocery store. Please remove this material.' This effort takes time and energy. But surely some fed-up women will find the time to make a polite fuss at their local convenience stores."

"Just as this hypersexualized culture enslaves men to lust, it also deceives women into thinking only sexual appeal insures significance or desirability. Even if women aren't on the street selling sex, these trends still impact how women feel about themselves. American women today base much of their self-worth on how sexually attractive they think they are. When women wake up to what culture's doing to their husbands, children, and themselves, hopefully they'll take action."

- Excerpts from "Pornification Nation" in the May/June 2008 issue of "Today's Christian Woman"

"The Christian rule is, 'Either marriage, with complete faithfulness to your partner, or else total abstinence.' Now this is so difficult and so contrary to our instincts, that obviously either Christianity is wrong or our sexual instinct, as it now is, has gone wrong. One or the other. Of course, being a Christian, I think it is the instinct which has gone wrong.

But I have other Reasons for thinking so. The biological purpose of sex is children, just as the biological purpose of eating is to repair the body. Now if we eat whenever we feel inclined and just as much as we want, it is quite true most of us will eat too much: but not terrifically too much. One man may eat enough for two, but he does not eat enough for ten. The appetite goes a little beyond its biological purpose, but not enormously. But if a healthy young man indulged his sexual appetite whenever he felt inclined, and if each act produced a baby, then in ten years he might easily populate a small village. This appetite is in ludicrous and preposterous excess of its function.

Or take it another way. You can get a large audience together for a strip-tease act - that is, to watch a girl undress on stage. Now suppose you come to a country where you could fill a theatre by simply bringing a covered plate on to the stage and then slowly lifting the cover so as to let every one see, just before the lights went out, that it contained a mutton chop or a bit of bacon, would you not think that in that country something had gone wrong with the appetite for food? And would not anyone who had grown up in a different world think there was something equally queer about the state of the sex instinct among us?"

- From Mere Christianity, by C.S. Lewis

:)

I'm on vacation so I don't have much time. I guess I could have much time if I chose to have much time. But I'm choosing to not have much time. So far, so good. A few highlights in point form:
- Niagara Falls, (2nd time this summer? Crazy!)
- seeing Alisha (2nd time this summer? Crazy!)
- fireworks
- hiking in less than prime hiking gear
- watching and listening to a thunderstorm with my family while singing songs in the Adirondack Mountains
I love camping trips! I love my family! I love summer!
The end.